Just Start: anything worth doing had a begining
The Naija Diaries: Entry 1
10min read
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” - Dwayne Dyer
Traveling can be either a nightmare or a breeze and I would call myself intermediate at best - So let’s fumble through this trip together 😭. I want this to be more than just a little summary of my day-to-day. I want you to see as I see, hear as my brain runs itself ragged. You are journeying as I’m journeying and maybe even growing with me: so let’s write our story together.
“Whatever it is, the way you tell your story even online can make all the difference.”
Firstly I should probably let you know where I’m at as a person because the more I sit here, the more my spirit tells me this trip isn’t a vacation; it’s a transformation. I’m not ashamed to admit I’m spoiled and privileged. I’ve had a great home life and even better environment to thrive in but at times I don’t feel like ive become a person yet.
On that note, I’m traveling with my Nigerian parents and honestly, they can be embarrassing 🤣 love ‘em to death but, wow. They’re at the age where they act like either this is the first time they’ve seen the outside world (overly excited about everything) or they can’t function without me. If you have immigrant or aging parents, you know what I’m talking about. Like why is it impossible to find the “check-in” on the kiosk without me?! Y’all are the ones with 20/20 vision. Be for real!
Anyway. I’m sitting on the 281 seater Delta airbus A330-900, seat 58c and now our journey begins.
I love flying Delta, especially internationally. Always a great experience… but I watched “Materialists” on the flight and the picture quality was trash in zone 5 seating. The price of poverty I guess 🥲. Anywhoooo, Dakota Johnson is pretty lack luster to watch every single time I see her on screen (for my thoughts on films, check out my Letterboxd). I hoped to watch one more movie before working on my various personal projects but give me white noise, like the drone of a plane, and suddenly a human shaped brick appears. I was rocked for 4 of the 9 hours.
Smooth air, Rough ride
Nigeriaaaa! My people, why are we so frustrating!!! “Sumtin foh da boizzz?”, “you will settle me naaahw?”, “please make me small gift for x-mas”. Nigeria is not easy. I see it. People have to hustle to make it in this country. It creates a culture where tips are mandatory and bribes are customary. But pulling people every which way in the middle of an already chaotic place is beyond exhausting. You will find the handful of helpers that deserve the tips though, stick with em. ALWAYS TIP AFTER don’t let anyone talk you into tipping before. I’ve seen many a traveler bamboozled and hoodwinked.
The airport hustle and bustle is almost behind us. As we wait for my Uncle to pick us up. I look at the various shades of brown faces and uniforms, some ragged and ridged from the constant grind. Others relaxed and pompous as if they were deemed the untouchables. This is Nigeria for sure. Disparity and desperation mixed in one place; at all times. I look at the sand colored sky and think, was there ever a time when the sky was blue here? The signs of an industrial hub.
Church of Ascension Catholic Church, Lagos Nigeria
The SUV pulls up ready to load our baggage between hugs and howls. Familiar sounds of joy when a circuit is reunited with its charge. My parents are a buzz - It’s beautiful. As we ride out I can’t help but admire the architecture of the Catholic Church right outside the airport. Like a trapezoid or buried spaceship it sits so oblong. a welcoming reminder of Nigerian ingenuity and I can’t help but feel a sense of belonging. As we journey along our way, nothing is cohesive, nothing is quite clean but everything has character.
“Oo the roads!! They’re better.” Tinubu is good for something it seems. In that same breath, we learn that the majority Igbo sections like, Festac, were left off the infrastructure list until recently. Bitterness over the election results I assume. And just like that, craters from water damage appear in the road - we’ve entered Festac. It’d be almost insulting to call them “potholes.” These canyons have eaten away diligently at the earth to bulk to these masses. Respect the Naija grind.
Lagos is a hubbbbb of excitement. If you want to find enjoyment on a trip here, this is one of the places to be… but I’m not here as a dignitary or a tourists. You’re getting the real real. So day one, I’m stuck in the house. No data, only text messaging until we go to the east, no convincing the prison guards for a 24hr international pass. Another reason to have my own phone plan 🙄 being spoiled is nice until you realize you’re in a cage. A cage confronted with just your thoughts at that…
First comes the feeling of isolation. You can’t venture out, where would you go? You already feel stir crazy but are too exhausted from the travel to move. So you lay there, trying to get some energy but…
Second comes the thoughts, those loud gremlins that live constantly in your head reminding you of all the things you’ve yet to do. Every instance in the last few weeks you messed up, embarrassed yourself, or fumbled a good thing. All the ways you’re wasting time, even though your job as a digital creative hangs on your access to the internet but conveniently…
Third comes sleep. The defense mechanism that either is a reaction to an overactive brain or a protection from the voices. Rocked again. What an exciting trip so far! Yes, yes, of course you’ll be able to have an exciting trip just like this if you want! It’s very affordable and minimal effort 😘
But in all honestly, the rest of the day was recovery and food. Good. FRESH! Food. THE CHICKEEEEEN!! Oh my. GOD. The non-antibiotics, un-injected, no preservative, freshly butchered, just barely still bloody, chicken❤️☺️. If nothing else, I identify as a carnivore through and through.
Honestly though, I’m grateful for the unplug, I got through the voices and did end up doing some works for projects. It made me think, “what does it truly mean to be unplugged for a moment? Without even an inch of an option to scroll on IG; my love and my cross.” The 3 stage withdrawal symptoms were real and I think it’s a prime example of one thing this trip will train me to do. Unplug. FOR REAL. At least for a moment or three.
When’s the last time you unplugged? Did the thoughts attack you too or is that just me? The truth is, I was finally able to face them. Yes, sleep “protected” me at a point but once I woke up, they continued and I had to accept them as false, remind my self of my goals while here, and move past the events that I can’t change.
So, day one wasn’t a dud. It was an exercise in mental fortitude, to forge a new path here. As I lay ready to force myself to sleep @ 12:55a ngt, 6:55p est, I am grateful to be home. In all the years we’ve visited Nigeria, the thought, “nothing will be the same this time” hits me and the implications of that starts to sink in. Joined by the silhouettes of Water Tanks above roofs, and 2 stars just over head, I think. “I’m not quite under the same sky” and likewise, I’m not quite seeing in the same perspective. I’m not sure what that’ll mean by the end of this trip but I hope you want to find out with me.
I invite you to unplug for REAL during the holidays. Throw the phone in a drawer for 2-3 hours, delete those apps for a few a day... remember: you’re not a spectator, you’re an active participant!
Welcome to the Naija Diaries
